It's hard to imagine that almost a year ago, I was holding back tears at Logan airport, hugging my roommate goodbye as I prepared to fly home to Italy after graduation. I had made a lot of friends during my time at Boston University, and almost all of them were planning on staying in the Boston area after graduation. And here I was, on a plane back to Italy, not knowing when I'd see them again. I wondered: had I made the right decision?
I loved my time studying in Boston, but my parents wanted me to return to Italy after I graduated. My older brother and sister lived at home with them, but they still missed me very much when I lived in America. Plus, the promise of a guaranteed job with my uncle's travel agency was too good to pass up- after seeing me design websites for several student groups at BU, he wanted to hire me to overhaul the web presence of his company. Still, I wondered how I would adjust to living with my parents while still trying to be an independent woman holding down a job.
In the weeks after I got home, it was difficult. I was initially excited about being closer to my family, but the cries of my sister's baby often kept me up at night, and it was very crowded in the house. Even though I lived with a roommate at BU, I still felt like I had my own space. But in Italy, it seemed like I couldn't do anything without everyone in my family knowing about it. I mentioned to one of my good friends that I was considering asking my friend Carlo out on a date, and before I knew it, my mother was calling his mother on the phone! I had to have a talk with my parents about appropriate boundaries. They often treated me like I was still 17, the age when I left for America, but now I am 22 and have matured a lot. Since we had that talk, my parents have let me do more things on my own and go out later with my friends.
I was concerned with losing my English skills when I moved back to Italy. In America, I spoke English almost all the time, but most of my relatives don't speak English as well. That's why I was thrilled when my uncle suggested that I start an English-conversation group with some of my coworkers at the travel agency. This helped my coworkers improve their English and helped me to maintain it. I also gained respect with some coworkers who were older than me.
Now that I've been in Italy for almost a year, I can't imagine how my life would have been if I stayed in Boston. I have a great job and am supported constantly by my family. I would suggest for other international students to communicate with your family about expectations regarding going out, cleaning, responsibilities, etc. Your family may think very differently about some of these topics, and you don't want to start an argument. With open communication, the transition to your home culture will be smooth.
Until next time,
Caterina Cavallo
Rome, Italy
I loved my time studying in Boston, but my parents wanted me to return to Italy after I graduated. My older brother and sister lived at home with them, but they still missed me very much when I lived in America. Plus, the promise of a guaranteed job with my uncle's travel agency was too good to pass up- after seeing me design websites for several student groups at BU, he wanted to hire me to overhaul the web presence of his company. Still, I wondered how I would adjust to living with my parents while still trying to be an independent woman holding down a job.
In the weeks after I got home, it was difficult. I was initially excited about being closer to my family, but the cries of my sister's baby often kept me up at night, and it was very crowded in the house. Even though I lived with a roommate at BU, I still felt like I had my own space. But in Italy, it seemed like I couldn't do anything without everyone in my family knowing about it. I mentioned to one of my good friends that I was considering asking my friend Carlo out on a date, and before I knew it, my mother was calling his mother on the phone! I had to have a talk with my parents about appropriate boundaries. They often treated me like I was still 17, the age when I left for America, but now I am 22 and have matured a lot. Since we had that talk, my parents have let me do more things on my own and go out later with my friends.
I was concerned with losing my English skills when I moved back to Italy. In America, I spoke English almost all the time, but most of my relatives don't speak English as well. That's why I was thrilled when my uncle suggested that I start an English-conversation group with some of my coworkers at the travel agency. This helped my coworkers improve their English and helped me to maintain it. I also gained respect with some coworkers who were older than me.
Now that I've been in Italy for almost a year, I can't imagine how my life would have been if I stayed in Boston. I have a great job and am supported constantly by my family. I would suggest for other international students to communicate with your family about expectations regarding going out, cleaning, responsibilities, etc. Your family may think very differently about some of these topics, and you don't want to start an argument. With open communication, the transition to your home culture will be smooth.
Until next time,
Caterina Cavallo
Rome, Italy